How To Move On From A Bad Break Up

"Love hurts! Love scars! Love wounds and marks...." This old song never goes out of style because most people get to the point where they can relate to the lyrics and sometimes sing along as they cry over a tub of ice cream after a bad break up. Friends will try to cheer you up and eventually you will get you out of your robe and you will stop crying over the one that got away. But deep inside, you will still be burdened by the pain and just like everyone else who has just broke up with their lover; you will ask....how do I move on? Some psychiatrists have given step by step ways on how to move on from a broken heart. First...

CRY TIL YOU CAN'T CRY ANY MORE

Accept the pain and let loose of all the tears you've been trying to hold back. As a human being, it is okay to cry when you feel like it. It is neither weakness nor a sign of defeat to break down. Tears don't make you the loser, they only mean that you are hurting right now and you are brave enough to express how you are feeling. Take your time and let it all out. Tears are a form of release and can be very relieving for someone who has been emotionally hurt. After you've finished several boxes of tissue paper to wipe off those tears, you will see that things will seem much clearer and you will be thinking straight once again.

AVOID AND CONQUER

Just like a boxer who has just been beaten up in the ring after a fight, you should recuperate by staying away from the cause of pain. A good rest or retreat would help you regain your emotional strength. Go on a quiet and relaxing vacation. Time away from things that remind you of your ex would give you a chance to clear your mind and realize that you are now free and can do whatever you want.

If you can, throw away or keep out of sight all the things around the house that belonged to your ex or anything that would remind you of that person. If you are really very angry, a good smashing and burning outdoors would definitely feel good. Just make sure you don't disturb or pester the neighbors.

FEED YOUR HATE

Now that all the material clutter has been disposed of, it is time you got rid of the emotional clutter as well. The fact of the matter is the real reason you are hurting is because you still love your ex. But in times when you feel that there is no more hope in getting back together, you have to learn to un-love your ex. How? Think of all the bad things your ex has done to you. Drown all the memories of your good times together by feeding your hate, as you remind yourself why you broke up in the first place.

LOVE YOURSELF MORE

In every break up, you can never put the blame on just one person. A good relationship survives through the efforts of both the man and the woman. When one of them cheats or falls out of love, there is a reason and most of the time the other one is to blame. Have you been too clingy, jealous, suspicious or needy? Or is it the other way around? Did you not spend enough time with your lover or were you not that attentive to his or her needs? If you realize that this is so, don't blame yourself. Forgive and make peace with yourself. You may have done some wrong for this relationship but you have to learn from the experience so your next relationship will not suffer the same fate. Love yourself more by working on your flaws and learning from your mistakes.

DON'T BURN BRIDGES

I know I told you to burn things that will remind you of your ex. But eventually when by the time the wounds of the break up have healed, and eventually you cross paths with your ex, it is best to forgive him or her and somehow be able to look that person in the eye and smile to show that you're okay now and you've moved on.

And with that smile, only time will tell where your path will take you. Will it be in the arms of another...or will it be love the second time around?

By Sheila Noreen Lopez - Gamo.